Breacking a Submissive

•April 16, 2010 • 1 Comment

Breaking is a term often heard within the BDSM community. The interpretation of what breaking means varies. In this area it is most often aligned with the ‘breaking’ of a horse or animal. Based on this interpretation the ‘spirit’ of the individual is being ‘broken’. Some people like to consider it that point where the ‘will’ gives way to a superior force. The actual breaking of an individual’s spirit is the last thing that a competent, healthy Dominant or submissive wishes to occur. The breaking of a ‘spirit’ removes the positive mental health of the individual. This would be similar to involuntary imprisonment such as during a war in a POW camp. It represents a desire to ‘break down’ the fundamental building blocks of the individuals psyche until they can no longer defend themselves from external invasion. The vanquishment of hope, self-respect and motivation to continue.

Sometimes a submissive believes that they need to be ‘forced’, ‘conquered’, or ‘overcome’ in order to maintain a level of self respect in submitting to another human being. It is a way they justify their need. This belief is erroneous and generally indicates an individual who has not openly embraced their needs or their self. It is also a way of avoiding self responsibility and imposing responsibility for your submissive conduct and responses onto your Dominant.

Many submissives approach Dominants asking to be ‘broken’. Based on the wide range of what this term means the Dominant is often confronted with conflicting thoughts as to what exactly the submissive is asking of them. A Dominant does not break a submissive. A submissive is not to be forced beyond their mental and physical limits. Such force is abuse!

Many submissives interpret ‘breaking’ to be a Dominant overwhelming their desire to resist thereby ‘forcing’ them into obedience. Again, this is based on a flawed understanding of the dynamics at work here. A submissive overcomes their own desires to resist. Control is exercised from within. To some extent the Dominant presents the submissive with increasingly difficult mental and physical tasks to perform. The submissive by ‘agreement’ endeavors to perform these tasks as issued.

A Dominant directs action and resists the ability or desire of the submissive to manipulate them. The submissive either follows direction or they do not. Based on the negotiated agreements of the relationship structure the Dominant and the submissive then engage in actions in response to actions or failure. However, it is crucial to remember that the submissive is completely responsible for their actions. The desire to obey or disobey is a voluntary process. Some relationships flourish with ‘tiny wars’ between the Dominant and submissive. Or, ongoing subtle insurrection. Others require a stronger demonstration. Many Dominants find a ‘level of resistance’ exciting and challenging in their submissive. Others desire a submissive capable of total self control.

A person expressing an ability or desire to ‘break’ another human being should be avoided by a submissive. That person is not a Dominant with a vested interest in the overall mental and physical health of a submissive. Such a desire demonstrates personal issues and problems which may be severe and could place a submissive in a situation of grave risk to them.

Advertisements

Intimacy

•April 16, 2010 • Leave a Comment

Intimacy is defined as a close personal relationship marked by deep affection and love, frequently characterized by depth of knowledge and attention.

Intimacy is something we long for. To be cherished and held, understood and accepted by those we care about the most is at the center of whether we experience our life as meaningful and joyous. Yet intimacy is often quite difficult to achieve. As much as we long for it, being truly intimate with another human being also represents an exposure to danger. In order to achieve the sense of intimacy we so deeply desire we must open ourselves. We must surrender our defenses, the barriers and walls we have so carefully built within ourselves over our lifetime. Surrender of these oft used and very important devices is incredibly difficult. We can never be certain of the motives of the people we invite inside our walls. This uncertainty, alone, can be enough to prevent the development and nourishment of intimacy.

At our center we are a ‘core being’, this is the pure self untainted by anger, rage, pain, embarrassment, shame, guilt, doubt. This core being is who we were before the challenges of life taught us that to be so innocent, so pure, was to be exposed to hurt, anguish, damage. What we truly long for is for another person to care enough, to be trustworthy enough, to share our core self with. We want someone to know our pure truth. That, is what we understand to be ‘true intimacy’.

As adults, we have not reached adulthood without sustaining damage. Without building walls and barriers to the very intimacy we want. We carry these shields as armor around our core self, protection from injury and unfortunately as protection from intimacy as well. There comes a point, particularly if the damage we have endured through our life has been extreme, where we begin to understand that we must heal our old wounds, the wounds still lingering open and pained, beneath the shield we long ago created around them. To heal these wounds we venture into our experiences of the past to face the wounds and comfort our core self, sharing self love with our self as well as the determination to be healed.

Healing is a choice, a decision, a desire to be free of damage and pain. It is often a journey of the spirit, of the mind and of the body. On some level we understand that to be able to experience true intimacy with other people we will have to surrender, relinquish and release our armor. Within this understanding we begin to know this journey of the spirit, of the heart, of the soul has no ending. We are always in a state of being healed, of embracing wellness of deciding to be more free.

We look often to the mind to heal the spirits wounds, we carry a belief that the body is in some way detached from who we are. It is perhaps a cultural idea, this division, this focus with importance upon the mind, the thoughts. We tend to believe we can fix ourselves from the outside in. This isn’t to say that analyzing, discussing and thinking about our experiences isn’t incredibly important. Often such work opens up our mental eyes to who we are, who we have forgotten we are, under all of the shields and walls.

But, this is only part of healing. When experiences happen which are injurious to us, our entirety is present. We store these memories not only in our thinking mind but within every cell in our body and within our spirit body, our belief in who we are. This is why bodywork becomes so profoundly important. Our healing therapy has touched our minds, opened our thoughts, connected us to the intellectual memories of who we are. Yet, we still recognize our barriers exist. They are partially addressed. Weakened perhaps. But still, too present. They continue to block our ability to achieve the self freedom and intimacy we long for.

Until we discover, touch!

The Art of Surrender

•April 16, 2010 • 1 Comment

Surrender: To cease trying to retain or control and agree to yield. To devote oneself entirely to ‘something’ without restraint, reservation or resistance.

We begin the process of identity construction at or before birth – perhaps as early as the first sonogram when physical characteristics of gender become visible and our first description is attached. We are ‘male or female’. This description is the product of judgment by persons external to ourselves, our parents, doctors, etc,. Before that first moment, before that first description, we are pure potential, undescribed, unshaped. There are no boundaries, no limits to how we manifest. Until that first description. From that moment forward we are told, ‘you are this’. And, without thought we accept this first language of identity. In that moment we yield to survival, we ‘are’ something and someone has deemed fit to tell us what it is. There is no guile or artifice. We haven’t those tools yet, so we simply accept. This begins a process of identity construction where we are told exactly who and what we are, so, we believe. We shape ourselves into the identity as if taking on clothing. It covers ‘us’, the unspeakable being we are, it creates recognition, a means to control.

As we grow up the layers of identity applied to us multiply, becoming heavier and heavier as they grow in depth and complexity until the potential, the core of the being we *are* is completely hidden. People outside of us ‘see’ the identity construction we have accepted through our belief. It becomes, ‘who we are’. Solved.

Except, it isn’t who we are. It is how we have been described inside the bondage of other peoples ideas, thoughts and judgment. It has little to do with who we are. When the whole process started no questions of us were asked. We have taken all our boundless potential and shaped it into the identity we have been given. We believe. We want to know who and what we are and those closest to us have granted our wish by creating this identity, so, we believe.

Somewhere along the path of our life we begin to feel the weight of this construction. How it bends our shoulders, drags our steps. It is hard work to shove ourselves inside this tiny construction, particularly as we evolve and grow, transforming. Staying still in our cooperation with the identity builders generates more and more frustration. Perhaps there is a moment we recognize where we must shatter the identity, perhaps deep inside we hear the voice of our core asking to be set free, to become pure potential again, where everything is possible.

So we face the conflict, the self knowledge of choice. To be what we are, or to be what we have been described. In that moment we see the bars around us, we understand the prison within which we exist, we feel the ache of loneliness, so hollow and empty. No one has really known us, they have only known the identity we have agreed to portray. If we shatter the identity will we lose even those who have created it for us? We recognize our fear.

Sometimes that is as far as we ever go, to the point of recognition of fear. We want to exist, to have understanding of who and what we are, we have a lifetime of *language* – we *know* our identity. We don’t know what is on the other side of the fear, under all of that stuff.

As we stand on the edge there is a knowledge that to go further, we have to surrender our belief in the identity so carefully constructed over our lifetime. We have to cease trying to retain and control our ego, scatter it before us into the nothing/everything of our own potential.

Is it possible to manifest our empowered self if we retain attachment to any identity construction? Don’t all such constructions become the limitations we seek to escape? Aren’t these constructions ‘resistance’, inhibitors? To be our inscrutable, unnameable self where everything is possible, where our potential is unfettered can we possess and be possessed by any inhibitions?

Sub Space

•April 15, 2010 • 2 Comments

Subspace – This term generally is used to describe a moderate to deep trancelike condition experienced by persons in the submissive position in a D/s relationship during interaction with the person in the Dominant position in the relationship.

TOP SPACE: I will start by regarding top space or normal space. This is operational ground zero. The submissive in top space often appears quite aggressive, assertive and dominant. They will be hustling their children off to school, dominating their Dominant mate by organizing him/her off to work, cleaning and straightening the house, sending themselves off to work or to take care of business. They are the Commander of the ship, the General of the Army. Hustle, hustle, hustle. This is a submissives TOP SPACE.

MARGINALLY DOWN SPACE: This space occurs when the Dominant in the relationship directs attention at the submissive. This may be a glance, a light touch, a small sound or any combination of these triggers. This marginal appearing contact drops the submissive out of top space into a state of waiting and/or listening for command. She stops. Generally she will cease talking even in the midst of a comment. She may stop moving. She will generally attempt direct eye contact with her Dominant to see if he/she has a direction or command for her. If nothing further occurs she will most likely re-top. Or, go back to full functional top space. If the Dominant mentally presses…she will generally descend further into space.

SPRITE SPACE: Some submissives will squirm and utterly deny that this space exists. They will swear to you that they don’t have it, it doesn’t exist and they would never perpetrate mischief. Hmmm. Essentially just under or into down space there is a space where the submissive will test the Dominants attention, desire and will to control her. She may unclip cuffs, slide out of assigned position – all in total innocence. She didn’t hear that command, the blindfold muffled her ears…etc… Note: If she notes that the Dominant doesn’t catch her action she will feel he isn’t paying her attention, therefore doesn’t love her (mind of women at work).

BLONDE SPACE: Now, as the submissive descends into space her IQ tends to diminish in a progressive fashion. Many submissives will tell you that their up person is off to the side watching everything. They, will feel themselves getting slower mentally. I call this blonde space <ducking the non-peroxide blondes> In blonde space the submissive has trouble with rational thought. If you ask her if something is uncomfortable she is likely to say “I dunno”. The truth is – she doesn’t know. At this point she is not capable of distinguishing danger to herself, she cannot and will not utilize any safeword – it become incomprehensible to her. In her mind, she has you the Dominant, she loves and trusts you, you won’t let anything happen to her.

SUB-VOCAL or PRIMAL SPACE: Sometimes the Dominant and the submissive penetrate what I call the sub-vocal barrier. The submissive in this space loses her submissive nature. If you intend to take her there have her well tied. As she drops through into this deep space she can and will get feral. Her voice becoming primal grunts and sounds, her eyes may alter, she will he hypersensitive to sound, light, movement. She will be fast and very dangerous. She can and will claw you, bite you or toss you into a wall if you are a small man. In a sense she is tapping into ancient primal body language. She becomes a predator <I>barely</I> submitting. If she senses any weakness in your control she will attempt to take you out. She cannot ever utilize safe words here. She cannot remember how to articulate human speech.

These are the basic levels of subspace. Prior to beginning an exploration of subspace the Dominant and submissive should have intensive conversations about what she may expect and how she may feel. The Dominant should set up a sequence of escape words. This should be a simple question that would never occur in common life. Something such as “What color is your left big toe?” Her auto-UP UP UP response might be “My left big toe is orange!” <giggle> Essentially this question asked at any time is her command to fast up or come to TOP SPACE NOW!!!

This escape question should be practiced multiple times until it becomes automatic.

I included the <giggle> for a very important reason…submissives in down space seldom laugh. Their ability to laugh and giggle seems to diminish as their focus intensifies on their Dominant in space. By requiring the <giggle> as well, the Dominant is assured that the submissive has returned to top space. Note: this command should only be used in a problem situation. For regular activities in subspace the submissive needs and desires to be ‘caught’ by the Dominant gently and allowed to return to top space in a normal way…this can take hours of after play cuddling.

Some basic information: Never ever leave your submissive alone in space unless you wish to risk severe potential problems… You are her sole connection to reality. If you leave her alone she is likely to be terrified. She will return to top space at some point and may never forgive you for leaving her.

Always keep your commands simple and direct. In space she will obey but comprehension is limited. Never impose responsibility on her for any aspect of the play. If you want interaction stay in Marginal Space or Sprite Space (sometimes known as Sammy Space). In any other down space she will not communicate well verbally. She may be unable to articulate your name at all.

Talk to her in a reassuring fashion if penetration of subspace is new – she may be frightened. The further into space she goes the higher the chems pump into her blood stream and generally the more intensive the play can become. For a first timer, you need to tell her that subspace exists, what it is and how it may feel to her. She will desire to please you and open to seek this space. She must feel that you know what you are doing even if you do not. She must be convinced that she is utterly safe with you.

Penetration of the different levels will vary for many reasons. Some people can only go so far. They have inhibitors. Often the penetration may occur over many months as the level of trust increases and the submissive relaxes into new experiences. You should not expect full flight from the beginning.

Figging.The Ginger Experience

•April 14, 2010 • Leave a Comment

Figging is one of those little niceties, although probably one of the lesser known of BDSM erotic techniques. It is either something you love or you hate but which ever it is, there is potential in any new experience, so until you have tried it, dont knock it.

“Figging”or the erotic use of ginger root, can be the most interesting and enjoyable pastime once the initial preparations have been completed. The method is little known, little used outside of the BDSM lifestyle and even then, having been superseded by commercial and chemical products the basic technique could be easily lost in time and lack of use which would be a pity as there are many advantages to the use of naturally produced substances.

Not much is known about the history of figging or how it became popular, other than stories handed down of it being used during caning, in Victorian times, when it would be inserted into the anus of the “victim” to prevent the butt clenching. The reason for the insertion in itself, is unknown as many, if they were to consider it would find the vision of a tight arse most enjoyable. Now however, mention figging or the more widely used expression of “Ginger” within a lifestyle setting and the “Ooohs” and “ahhhas” will reverberate around the room.

The technique is one that does however take some forward planning (in the initial purchasing and preparation) but even that as a precursor and anticipation factor can add enjoyment to the proceedings. Sending one’s sub out to the supermarket or the greengrocers to buy the ingredients for the evenings play can be most erotic, then to have them prepare those ingredients for both the Master’s and sub’s pleasure adds spice (no pun intended) to an evening of pleasure. Of course, it does help if both those involved are into anal play as like every aspect of the lifestyle, mutual consent is paramount if both are to enjoy the experience. If the sub for example finds this kind of play, a hard limit then the Dominant must respect that and once again, figging should be put away until such times as the limit is removed or both parties are happy to look at it again.

So let us then look at the preparation needed and how best to use this naturally produced toy, sold as a “hand” because that’s what it looks like, with its protruding nodes resembling fingers. Many larger supermarket chains now sell gingers, pre-cut and packaged for ease of use in the kitchen or at the very worst, its sold ground or powdered, which is not a lot of use to those who have different ideas for its use, therefore it is recommended that as there is little benefit in ginger sold in this form, you stay away from it and make the attempt to buy a full uncut version, thus enabling, in preparation, a nice sized plug of ginger.

Once purchased, keep the ginger in a cool dry place until you are ready; let the anticipation build, watch the sub squirm every time they catch a glimpse of the hand. Seriously though, it is best used fresh unless you have time to allow it to age properly for a day or two. If you can’t wait that long, then let the fun begin.

Some Dominants prefer to prepare the ginger themselves, while the sub looks on, waiting, maybe knowing what is coming next, maybe not. Others may prefer the sub to prepare the plug to the Masters requirements, while watching to ensure it is completed with precision and care: either way, the technique for preparation is as follows.

Cut a finger from the hand. Unless the chosen finger is long enough don’t cut it at the joint with the hand but rather extend the cut into the hand itself giving you a longer uniform shape. It should be no less than 4 inches in length but the longer the better. Remove the outer brown skin making sure that it’s all removed. Make sure that the plug is smooth, with no bumps or protrusions. Be careful not to remove too much of the flesh or narrow the finger in its main body. Take your time sculpting the finger; it will be well worth the effort if it fits snugly into the sub.

Ginger is fibrous, and may take time to prepare, it also has a distinct aroma, which in itself can be an anticipation factor, so don’t rush, enjoy the preparation as part of the play.

Once satisfied with the sculpture, one last but most important cut is needed before the sub can enjoy the results of all that hard work. You now have to perform the tricky bit. About two-thirds of the ways down the sculpture, carefully carve a concavity. This will act as a retention device. Similar to a butt plug where the sphincter locks around the tapered portion of the plug, the concavity will do the same thing. Make the ring no more than a half inch wide. Remember; do not taper the finger all the way down to the end. You want full circumference of the finger two-thirds of the way down, a half-inch retention ring and then full circumference continuing down to the end of the finger. Do not carve out too much however, as this will weaken the finger and increase the possibility of breaking while in the sub. You don’t need a very deep ring for retention.

Now having spent this time in preparation and anticipation, it is best if the sub is laid, face down, bound or not, with a pillow underneath to lift the buttocks into a position which makes it easy to insert the plug into the anus. Unlike a butt plug or your own finger you do not need lube when using a ginger plug; in fact use of these will diminish the effects of the ginger. Instead use cool water to keep the root moist as you insert it slowly into the anus. Take your time and be gentle, the finger will slide in with care. Continue to push it in until the subs anus closes around it and wait; the Doms’ task is finished, now comes the interesting part to watch or enjoy depending which end you are at.

For the Dominant, the knowledge that he is in control, he can remove the plug and insist that if the sub wishes to continue the experience they beg for more, he can just sit back and take pleasure in the effects his sub is experiencing, he could also add to the seesion by using other methods of pleasure or pain to stimulate his sub while they attempt to go with the effects that are building up slowly.

For the sub, the sensations are aided by the mental side of figging, all the aspects put together, the anticipation, the plugging, the obvious effects the ginger itself may be having, even the humiliation side of being exposed, bound etc are all part of the play session.

One of the attributes of ginger is that of the “build up” effect. It starts as a gentle warming, then as the ginger juice seeps into the subs flesh the sensation of burning builds to a crescendo. Depending upon how resilient your sub is, or how potent the ginger is, the reaction will be different from sub to sub, as they feel the sensation deep inside them. Of course there is also the mental aspect of being plugged, at the Masters mercy, tied, bound, exposed as they lay there while their Dom looks on at the spectacle of a writhing sub as the effects build.

Expect different reactions with each individual sub; the effects are quite noticeable and are a pleasant forerunner to further play. To increase the burning effect ordering the sub to clench the butt muscles gives a dramatic increase in the already obvious pleasure-pain that the sub is enjoying. These effects will last some 20 minutes and as the potency wears off, the sensation decreases dramatically, as it will if the plug is removed from the sub if it is found that the experience is not being enjoyed.

As with any natural produce, no matter how much of an effect you wish to generate in any given session, there is no risk of any harmful or lasting damage to your sub in the use of ginger and as stated, what effects are generated are short lived. Simply remove the plug once the potency declines and continue with other teases or toys to enhance your session.

Ginger can be used on the clit, in thin slices together with a plug or as a stand alone technique or if you wish to have your sub begging for release, use it back, front and clit and wait for the fireworks.

For the male sub, ginger has a use too. Place a slice, approx. 1/8 to ¼ inch wide and an inch long, smoothed, into the urethra of the cock, leaving enough outside to allow for removal. The effects will be quite dramatic and almost immediate as the sub reacts to the burning sensation. If it gets too much, the slice can be removed for a while and replaced, removed, replaced until the effects finally subside, dependant on how much the Domme wishes to tease the sub.

For greater effect, be patient; stored ginger tends to loose its zap. However if you have a little left over from this session, put it in a sealed plastic bag and store it in the fridge for a few days. Check it occasionally and if moisture has formed inside the bag and a little mould is showing on the root, it’s looking good. Don’t worry about this mould; once peeled and prepared as before, watch out as with age comes potency and this time the sub will most definitely know who is in control. Once you insert the plug, it won’t be them. Note: Any leftover root should now be discarded and it’s time to send sub to the shops again.

A couple of cautionary points to note here: some people can be allergic to ginger, if this is the case, then obviously this in not something that a Master and sub will be able to enjoy. It’s likely that most who are will know in advance anyway. Very few are.
If by some aggressive wriggling or too tight a clenching of those butt muscles the sub manages to break the finger while it is still inserted and you cannot retrieve it, don’t panic, let nature take its course and as the old saying goes, “what goes up, must come down will most definitely apply in this case.

Enjoy the experience, play safe.



BDSM Humor

•April 14, 2010 • Leave a Comment

Top 7 Submissives Found Online

1. POOR-ME SUB:
This “sub” always has something going wrong in her life. Of course, it is never her fault..she is always being played upon and victimized by others. If only she found the *perfect* dom, her life would be problem-free and forever-blissful.
Favorite IM to send: “Will you be my dom, sir? I am just a helpless little subbie.”
Favorite IM to receive: “Just do what I say, slave!”

2. JUST-DO-ME SUB:
This “sub” just wants to be beaten. It doesn’t really matter by who, or what..as long as he (I use “he” here because these are typically male) can feel the lash. Frequently misbehaving on purpose, this sub can drive a dom *crazy*.
Favorite IM to send: “I have been naughty and need to be punished. Spank me now, Mistress!”
Favorite IM to receive: “You are a bad sub and need to be punished! Bend over!”

3. BARBIE-SUB:
This “sub” just likes the way she looks in leather fashions. She is afraid of the whip, and has never seen a clamp in her life. Her favorite store is “Dream Dresser”, and her whole paycheck is spent there each week.
Favorite IM to send: “Would you like to know what I am wearing, sir?”
Favorite IM to receive: “What are you wearing?”

4. HE-HURT-ME SUB:
This “sub”, without any negotiations, talk of limits or safewords, rushes out to a country cabin to to play with a dom she met 2 days ago online. After letting him tie her up and whip her, she decides he is a menace to society, and can’t wait to tell all her “sub” friends he is a “BAD dom”.
Favorite IM to send: “Subsis, I need to pass on a warning to you!”
Favorite IM to receive: “My poor subsis, you have got to warn everyone about this creep!”

5. I-JUST-NEED-A-MAN SUB:
This “sub”, after exhausting all her singles bar and healthclub meting places, decides that the D/s world would be a good place to meet a *man*. she really has no interest in D/s, she just needs someone to spend the rest of her life with. She is a close relative of POOR-ME SUB. Amazingly, when she “gets her dom”, she suddenly looses interest in any type of sex.
Favorite IM to send: “Sir, will you take care of me forever?”
Favorite IM to receive: “I have always dreamed of having a large family.”

6. NO-ONE-CAN-TOP-ME SUB:
This “sub” longs to submit, yet claims no dom is strong enough to top her. Some say she is really just a domme in disguise.
Favorite IM to send: “Think you are strong enough to put me in my place, jerk?”
Favorite IM to receive: “No, Mistress, I am really just a weak and helpless slave. ::falling to the floor and kissing your boots::

7. SUBMISSION IS THE GREATEST GIFT Submissive.
This submissive has stars in her eyes and naivity in her heart. She swoons at the mere thought of a dom, any dom, asking her to pass the salt. She writes her dom’s name in the corner of her notebook with little hearts and flowers around it. She declares that there is no better way to love than through submission, and that d/s is a “better” and “higher” manner of loving than anything a silly old vanilla person might do. She lives on an emotional roller-coaster, sentimental enough to cry when seeing a long-distance phone company commercial.
Favorite IM to send: “You are all of life to me, there is nothing about life worthwhile without you.”
Favorite IM to receive: “I am everything you’ll ever want or need, and I’ll protect you from everything.”


Irritants

•April 10, 2010 • 5 Comments

Please note that the vagina has its own chemistry and ph balance and is somewhat sensitive to this. I’d tend to recommend that you allow plenty of time after a session for recovery before the next session My personal guidlines have been to allow a few days between applications (assuming a ‘small/medium’ application) and perhaps more after a longer/more intense session. There are no rules, but upsetting the vagina’s chemical balance could greatly increse the effects or chances of yeast and other feminine type infectionsand problems.

My general recommendation is to dilute between 5:1 and 20:1 when you are trying things out. Some of these substances can cause chemical burns that blister if used in large quantities or on people who are extra sensative or in full strength.

Some people may be allergic so you should be careful of allergic reactions. You will get different reactions of different strengths on different locations. One of my partners tried a little on her wrist and it burned/caused more reddining there then nipples or cunt. Some of these will hit at pretty much full strength on contact, others can take a few minutes to build up.

I dilute the oils with water by useing a small bottle with a cap and shaking vigerously to form a suspension and reshaking as needed.

You should allow time between apications when trying things out at the beginning levels as one substance may dull the senses and give false or misleading intensity readings on other substances. You may also find that substance a causes substance b to be much more intense.

Some substances can be toxic and absorbed through the skin. READ THE LABEL. Then READ THE LABEL AGAIN. I try to only use substances either designed to be eaten and/or applied to the body.

Many of these substances are oils and will eat plastic/latex at various speeds. Being oils, they will not wash off with plain water, you have to use soap or other cleansers.

Substance List

Cinnamon Oil:
Availible at party and baking supply stores in .5 to 2oz bottles (food grade for flavoring) or at some drug stores/pharmacies in 8oz or larger bottles (not food grade, but I do use it on nipples). Used on nipples (full strength), it provides a mild burning sensation and a nice odor:). Used on the labia, it provides a burning sensation which at full strength is very intense. (My play partner dashed for the bathroom to wash it off, others have found it just bearable and very intense). I usuallly apply it with a q-tip. This is strong stuff most. Be very careful! I’d recommend a 20:1 dilution to start.

Peppermint extract:
Provides a cool burning when applied to labia, quite pleasent actually. No nipple effects. Available at grocery stores.

Wintergreen:
Similiar to Cinnamon oil, but not as strong and a ‘cooler’ burning sensation. I’ve applied it to nipples and crotch.

Tobasco sauce:
Very intense on labia or rectally on a butt plug. One bottom reports using a 1:1 dilution for ‘pleasure’ scenes and full stength for punishment scenes. Starts near full intensity and wears off over time or washing.

Oriental hot oils:
There are several. One person reports a vanalla partner wanted to try this rubbed on her crotch and enjoyed it for awhile, but it built up to an intense burning after a short while (I’d guess about a half a minute or so). Starts very mild and builds over time. Different brands/types may react differently.

Jalapeno peppers:
The reports sound a lot like tobasco sauce, but I don’t how the intensity compares to tobasco sauce. Olive oil is reported to alleviate the effects.

Toothpaste:
Mild burning sensation when used anally, fairly popular and the most often used in regular scenes, when substances are used. Unless you think you’re very sensitive, I’d use full strength.

Ben-Gay, Tiger Balm, Icy-Hot, and other mneral rubs:
Different reactions from different people. Usually more intense applied frontally then anally, but different people respond differently. I seem to be immune to them anally, while others find them much stronger. These are more intense when exposed to air/water. I’m not sure how to dilute these. I’d just use very small quantities, well rubbed around. I’ve used it with KY on dildoes and rubbed directly on the crotch

Vicks vapor rub:
Start with small dabs. The effect peaks quickly and fades in about 15 minutes. Very hard to remove.

Other hot sauces: you’re on your own. I’d assume that the heat in erotic use is similiar to how much it burns your tongue as you eat it.

Stuff NOT to Use!

Things not to use!! This are again from peoples reports either posted to the net or in email.

Acetone:
Extremely intense burning when applied to the crotch and probably toxic. It will not wash off, you’re stuck leting it fade over time.

Cheap Perfume (high alcohol content):
A female bottom I’ve corresponded with put about 1-2 teaspons on a tampon and inserted it anally. felt good going in, but murder coming out and she worshipped the porcelon pot for about half a week as well as smelling bad.

Fubbing/Ispropol Alcohol:
These are not desinged for internal consumption or use. They almost always denatured (made poisonous) to prevent drinking.

Some Scene Ideas

When I show dilutions, 1:1 is 1 part water to 1 part irritant, 5-10:1 is dilutions of 5:1 through 10:1.

light: rectal – toothpaste (crest is a good brand)

        front - Wintergreen diluted 5-10:1, tobasco or Cinnamin oil
                diluted 10-20:1.
        nipples - Cinnamon oil 5-10:11 or wintergreen 5:1

mild: tobasco front or rear diluted 10-15:1

        front - Cinnamin oil/wintergreen diluted 5-10:1, small amount of
                bengay/icy-hot/tiger balm.
        nipples - wintergreen 2:1 or Cinnamin oil 2-5:1

intense:tobasco front or rear diluted 2-5:1

        front - Cinnamin oil 2-5:1, Wintergreen full strength to 2:1,
                bengay/icy-hot/tigerbalm a normal amount rubbed in.
        niples - Cinnimon oil or wintergreen applied full strength.

punishment:

        tobasco front or rear at full strength.
        Cinnimon oil applied front at full strength.
        liberal quantities of bengay/icy-hot/tiger balm well rubbed in.

Intense/punishment scene: Take a tampon and liberally coat it with tobasco sauce and insert it rectally. Take a second tampon and liberally coat it with tobasco sauce, bengay, icy-hot, or cinnimon oil and insert if in front. Then take a sanatary napkin or cotton pad and coat with one of these and first rub well on labia/clit and then hold it firmly in place with a crotch strap. She should be restrained so she can not interfer or remove things until you decide she should or until she accomplishes some task (predetermined before the scene). You can also just use butt plugs and coat them appropriatly. Putting condoms on things makes clean up easier.

Mild scene: Use a qtip to apply the irritant (diluted) to the front. Apply full strength to nipples. Use toothpaste or diluted substance in rear.

A normal amount of cinnimon oil/tobasco sauce on a plug would be 2-6 drops.